Neely McQueen has been working with teen girls for over 15 years. She is also married to a pastor and the mom of 3 cute kids. Follow her on twitter.
(WARNING: there’s some language in this video!)
So many possible application for this video in youth ministry! This weekend I played a clip (just the shooting part near the end) of this video during the service to illustrate how fast news travels nowadays. I made a comparison to how the Good News of Jesus traveled, without the aid of technology, through the world in the book of Acts. Made for a great pause/illustration in the middle of the talk!
JG
Hi my name is Matt Murphy and along with Brad Widstrom, wrote 99 Thoughts for Caring for Your Youth Group. Below are insights into our book writing process and how everything came about. Our hope in this is that you would be able to see our hearts behind our NEW Book 99 Thoughts on Caring for Your Youth Group. If you have questions my contact info is at the bottom. I will also be at the Simply Youth Ministry Conference in Louisville, KY this year, probably around the books, so if you see me stop by and say hi!
click the above image for a FREE Sample Chapter
Why 99 Thoughts for Caring?
- I chose to write a book about helping youth workers care about their youth group from A to Z because it is a huge part of my passion and calling. Coming from the Social Work field, my perspectives on caring, not only in the technical aspects of caring, but how to do certain types of caring, such as hospital visits, jail visits or coffee shop counseling helped me choose to put together this book. My suggestion to anyone wanting to write anything is to do it from a place where they are both passionate about and have some form of experience of doing it, that way you can talk about both angles? as in Head and Heart knowledge (or wisdom).
How did this become a collaborative project?
- When [...]
Posted by Scott Rubin
I wasn’t intending to write a blog post right now. But just had an interaction that made me want to jot some things down? (If you can see a parallel between middle schoolers and senior citizens, this post might make sense.)
I got in early this morning, needing to crank through some things before anyone else gets to the office. I flipped on my computer, and went to empty my overflowing trash can before attacking my day. Walking back to my office, I ran into a 70-year-old volunteer from our church who helps do cleaning stuff around here, early in the mornings. (In my opinion, jr. highers and senior citizens can both be a bit ?invisible? to people if they?re not careful!)
When I said ?how are you doing? to this guy (not realizing he was really going to tell me!), he proceeded to fill me in about the stroke he had last year, and how he?s recovering from it. I was aware that I really wanted to get to my office & dig into the stuff I need to get done today? but I tried to dial in with him? it only took 5 minutes. Honestly though, I was probably half-listening, and half thinking of my ?to-do? list for the day. He told me about how his left side was paralyzed last May, but now he?s doing better.
As I wished him a good day & started to leave, he said 5 words that made me pause: ?Thanks for [...]
Mission trips can be very heavy on logistics. Where you go. Where you stay. Who you serve. How you serve them. What you eat. How you get there. And many more details? Ugh. In the mountain of all that info, it?s easy to miss planning and preparing for what may be the most important thing that will happen on your mission trip.
Your students encountering Jesus in new and powerful ways.Let?s quickly make sure we agree on a few things (I?m sure we do, just double-checking):
OK, do we agree? If so, then?
To get started here?s several questions to ask to help shape the spiritual growthgoals you have in mind as part of your mission experience.
Where are my students and adults at spiritually?
- individually
- the group as a whole
How do the following issues impact your times of worship or spiritual [...]
You are right, there are far more dangerous jobs than youth ministry. I am extremely thankful that my husband does not stare down the barrel of a gun. I cannot imagine the kind of strength a wife would need for that. No matter what the job each one of us, including myself, has and will face great tragedies. Just in each day there are so many ups and downs. Our lives are sprinkled with many different feelings and emotions from happiness to thankfulness, to frustration to sorrow. My hope is that not one of us would deny ourselves the right to feel validated in each and every feeling that we have that gets mixed up inside of us. I hope that in some small way this blog may be a place for someone in ministry to feel heard, connected, and uplifted through a comment, a funny story, or a serious post. And what I love so much about this community of women is the honesty shared about their lives, and the tone that we all take loving God and our husbands seriously but don’t take ourselves too seriously.
I write this in no way with a defensive voice, but with so much concern that many pastor’s wives are told that their feelings are silly or not important. Whether from someone at church or their own inner dialogue. Our “perspective” should be to accept and embrace our feelings whatever they may be and then with God [...]
Help a girl out! I’m working on my third session of my Small Church Youth Ministry track at the upcoming Simply Youth Ministry Conference in Louisville the first weekend of March. Post your ideas in the comments here. My brain is fried and so its time for me to pick yours!
q Jeremiah 1:4 ?The Word of God came to me saying, before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born, I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.?
q God had a vision a plan for you. Do you have one for the assignment He has given you?
q Vision: The picture of God?s potential, purpose, and possibilities for your life.
q Show me a person without vision, and I will show you a person who is at a standstill in life.
q Proverbs 29:18 ?Where there is no vision the people perish.?
q Life Point: The key element to getting out of my present state is the vision that I have for myself.
q Jeremiah 29:11 ?For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope,
Vision Truthsq True vision goes beyond what I can accomplish on my own.
q True vision adds value to others.
q True vision attracts vision.
q True vision must have God in it.
q Acts 2:17 ?And it shall come to pass in the last days says God, I will pour out of my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and daughters shall prophesy and your young men shall see visions and your old men shall dream dreams.?
5 Road Blocks to Vision FailureIt’s just days away! I spent a good amount of time today working on my upcoming workshop!
We’ll be examining the outside voices coming at young girls and how the church can counter those voices.
What are some messages that you think girls are hearing today? And what can the church do to help them?
Also- will you be at Simply Youth Ministry Conference? If so, let’s have coffee!!!
This weekend we celebrated as we baptized 13 students.
Watching students make this public declaration of their faith is one of my highlights in ministry. As I read each student’s story, I was struck by the where they had come from and where God was clearly taking them. So thankful that I get to be a part of God’s work in the lives of students.
Monday I got a surprise in the mail!!! Who doesn’t love surprises in the mail???
It came from a fellow youth worker, mom and friend who I met at the Student Leadership Conference last summer…she also happens to make and sell adorable jewelry on Esty. She sent me some of the cutest earrings ever! I’ve been wearing them everyday since I got them!
She sent me 3 pairs- white, light pink and hot pink ones!! I love them.
The earrings were a cool reminder that we are all in this together. It doesn’t matter that she lives in California and I live in Washington…we love working with and encouraging girls to be world changers!! Love the community!
Do you feel like you are alone? You’re not!! There are men and women just like you all around the world…serving and loving on teenagers. And in a weird way…we’re in it together.
Be encouraged…I know I am!!
When I stop to think about the messages that are targeted at women of all ages- I believe that one of the strongest messages is about the size of their bodies. No matter a girl or a women’s achievement at some point her weight is considered part of the dialogue.
Take for example, Adele, I love her music and she just left the Grammys with 6 awards. But just days before a famous fashion designer called her fat. Adele is creating some of the greatest music these days. She’s beautiful and confident…and people call her fat.
Imagine being an insecure teenage girl who happens to feel unsuccessful. Imagine feeling like you aren’t good at anything and you feel like nothing is right about your life. Loud and clear you hear from the world if you want to make something of yourself be skinny. You search online and find “thinspiration” and “pro-ana” websites everywhere. On these sites you can connect with other girls who seem to be just like you…encouraging you on in your pursuit of significance through appearance.
The problem with the last paragraph is that you don’t have to imagine it. Every week, I talk with girls who that is their life. And you probably do to…whether you know it or not. They feel insignificant and the world is screaming at them if you want to matter you have to be thin. These girls aren’t just young either…they are in college, they are moms, they are grandmas.
This issue is everywhere.
It HAS to be part of our dialogue. We have to realize the pressure and the importance of weight to girls. Because if don’t speak up about it and if we don’t engage, some of these girls will never understand their true worth.
There are a few different type of girls and levels for which they deal with their weight:
1. Confident Girl- this girl has found things that she is good at and feels confident in that area of her life which flows over into other areas. She’s not thinking constantly about her weight but it’s there…
2. In Deep Girl- this girl is in deep with her obsession with her weight. She needs professional help and will probably struggle with it for her life. Getting her and her family professional help is one of the best things that we can do.
3. The Average Girl- this will be 90% of the girls in our ministries. They are insecure and still in self discovery…still trying to find their place. In some desperate moments they will make attempts to change their figure in a drastic and/or dangerous way.
All of these girls need us to be a speaking the truth of God’s love and acceptance of them…an acceptance that is not based on what they do or how they look. And we must try our best to model this unconditional love to them.
What do you think? Is this message really everywhere? What can our youth ministries do to help girls deal with these messages?
I am all drugged up. After being sick for a month I finally went to the doctor for the real medicines. What finally pushed me over was our winter retreat!!! So, I am recovering!
We had a great weekend in Leavenworth!
We won the big game and got our hands on some cold hard cash!! It was a blast!
This weekend reminded me that girls who know the truth still needed to be reminded of the truth.
*You are God’s chosen
*You are worthy of good choices
*God is calling you to bigger dreams
*Your story matters
We can’t speak the truth enough in their lives. Even when we are tired, sick and feel like giving up- we need to keep speaking up for the girls in our lives!
I love this video!! The story behind it is that the New York Giants coach watched it and later showed it to his team to teach them determination and commitment!
That spirit of commitment is in every girl…our job is to help them discover what in life is worth fighting for and to never give up!!
I’ve noticed something lately about the way the church and youth ministries tend to talk to girls. We (unfortunately at times I would include myself) communicate that the end game for a girl is getting the right kind of guy. Even though we don’t mean to it just happens. Books sold to teen girls about how to get the right kind of guy (a christian book nonetheless…and I haven’t read it but I am assuming the title is meant to mislead by promising to help girls snag a guy.) A youtube video for Christian girls on how to attract a godly guy. And than we are surprised and frustrated that all girls care about is boys. Oh the irony.
We need to change the end game.
The end game for every girl we encounter should be a radical life following after Jesus. That life may include an occupation in the public circles, a life of full time ministry, marriage, kids or all of the above.
When we begin to believe in a bigger or more radical end game for girls it changes how we communicate to them. We tell their stories better. And in my heart I believe we help girls move their attention from dating to bigger dreams…from drama to radical living. Don’t we all really want that for our girls?
What do you think? What are your thoughts about changing the end game?
Today we launched our Care Team for student ministries. A group of students committed to caring for others – the ones who are likely to slip through the cracks.
We’ll follow up with each first timers and with the students who have been missing for more than 4 weeks.
We’ll send postcards and make phone calls.
It was cool to watch students be excited about caring!
Why does follow up matter?
1. Students need to be seen and noticed. Follow up says we see you and we notice your presence and your absence. It validates them.
2. Student Ministries need to be about individuals. Follow up says that each student matters…not the regulars or the leaders but everyone.
I love follow up and I think it’s so essential to a student ministries. We’re just in the beginning stages of follow up and we’re still trying to develop our plan! What are you doing for follow up?
Mike Howerton, My pastor, boss and friend has recently released a book titled Glorious Mess. (Well, it comes out this week but we got it early at Overlake). I am really proud to call Mike my friend and pastor. Glorious Mess examines the messy life of Jonah and the surprising ways in which God was glorified in his life. There are a so many great quotes that can inspire you and your students. Since he’s a pastor and has a pastor’s heart, Mike has created small group resources to go alongside the book…they are included right in the book. We are actually using it with our students now in our youth ministry! It’s really good stuff and the students are getting some solid teaching.
“Orthodoxy or ‘right belief’ is important.But it must be accompanied by orthopraxy- right living! Jonah says he worships the one true God of the universe while he is actively trying to escape God’s call.”
“Recognizing our mutual need of God’s unbelievable grace is what allows God to use our glorious mess for his glorious kingdom! His love for imperfect people is unending”
Great book! You should definitely check it out!!
Youth Ministry Girls | Girls Youth Ministry | Girls Ministry – More Than Gossip MoreThanGossip believes that the girls that we meet in our ministries everyday matter more than just a lesson on gossip. We believe that girls matter to Jesus and that in order to minister to them we must understand them. Our goal is to create a place where together we can learn more about topics that are important to girls and to be aware of current cultural messages around them. MoreThanGossip is a place to explore the joys, the challenges and the \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\"secrets\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\" of ministry to teenage girls and their \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\"girl world\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\".
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