Have you ever been drawn into a reality show? Where you find yourself just sitting there watching someone else’s life turn into a complete trainwreck? I know I have. Recently, I was watching a show that came recommended to me by a friend…she told me that I would love it and that it would be highly educational for me. And, while I don’t necessarily love it…I can’t turn away from it and it is highly educational. The show is called Intervention. Have you ever seen it?

If you haven’t…basically, it follows a family preparing to intervene for a family member who is struggling with an addiction or other self destructive behaviors. It’s very intense and very sad.

What struck me in the few episodes (thanks netflix!) that I watched, specifically the ones focused on girls were that of the 5 shows I watched 4 of the girls had family trauma during their teen years. What happened to them during their teen years directly effected how they are living as an adult. (Surprised?) I wondered if the whole trainwreck could have been avoided if a caring adult would have been there to help encourage and walk with the girl through the traumatic event.

Thoughts on how we can help girls avoid the trainwreck:

• Know their stories.Seems like a simply thing to say, right? Yet, I find myself surprised sometimes when a girl I have known for awhile begins talking to me about something tough going on in their home…and I realize that I had no clue. Ask them to share…are their parents divorced? Are both parents living? Is there family struggling because of the hard financial times? The more we know the better we can care!
• Believe them. People, not just girls, have been known to exaggerate the truth and in some cases when a girl shares her story the details may seem far fetched. But, here is the deal…whether truth or an exaggeration of the truth…a girl telling a story is crying out for some kind of help. Maybe you do a little research on the story before you assume anything but right away you believe that a girl needs help!
• Engage the whole family. If we want to really help, it may mean engaging the family. Allowing yourself to minister to the whole family not just the girl in their homes and on their turf. You are modeling real compassion and embracing the girl in the midst of her situation NOT just when it’s easy and she’s in your youth room.

We (the Church) need to surround these girls that are on their way to a trainwreck. I am more convinced than ever…if they should be any place, it should be in the church. Jesus is not just for the healthly but the sick…He is not just for the girl whose got it all together but he is for the girl that is completely falling apart. Is it messy? Yes. Is it hard? Yep! But do we have the hope for them? YES!

Join the conversation- what are other ways we can help girls who desperately need help? Are these girls welcomed in your youth ministry?